michelle’s dilemma
by Ari Holtz
Published: June 20, 2008
Since Barack Obama secured the Democratic nomination for president about two weeks ago, there has been increased attention on his wife Michelle. The attention has ranged from the fair-minded to the absurd. Her comments about not previously being proud of her country led to attacks on her patriotism. Right-wing blogs raged about a video where she allegedly used the epithet ‘whitey’ until such a video failed to surface. Fox News referred to her as Barack’s “baby mamma”. In recent days, the Obama campaign has responded to this microscope by assigning Mrs. Obama a public-image-savvy chief-of-staff and attempting to soften her image with an appearance on “The View”. Clearly, the campaign feels that she cannot be free to be herself on the trail. Who, then, should she be?
The intense scrutiny leveled on a nominee’s spouse may seem unfair to a husband or wife who has made no decision to enter public life other than to marry who they married. Nonetheless, it is, and should be, fair game. This is not because we need to know everything about Michelle Obama or Cindy McCain just for the sake of it, but rather because who they are as people tells us about their husbands, our potential presidents. Who one picks to marry is the Rorschach of all Rorschahs, a personality test that tells us much about an individual’s inner self. We explore Michelle Obama and Cindy McCain not because we are interested in them, but because we are interested in the men who chose them as wives.
Consequently, Michelle Obama is a campaign issue and her image must be managed and controlled. All evidence points to the fact that Mrs. Obama is an accomplished, strong, intelligent, independent African-American woman of substance. It seems, however, that this is not okay. As shown by the incidents mentioned above, being an outspoken, independent, African-American woman is clearly not working for her. Being so makes her a target. What would not make her a target, and what does the discomfort with her more natural self say about segments of the populace?
Perhaps Mrs. Obama could be a more conventional wife. She could talk about motherhood and cooking and safe issues like literacy and health care for children. She could remain meek and coy when questioned about difficult, controversial issues such as race, the economy or Sen. McCain’s stances.
Would this work, though? Could Barack Obama restrain and limit his wife without contradicting his entire essence of modernism and progressivism? And what of Mrs. Obama? The Harvard Law graduate suddenly muzzling herself when talking about things other than dinner recipes and the Special Olympics? What would it say about her to do such a thing? Would she not be criticized from the left for being anti-feminist and regressive?
So, her natural, strong self is not acceptable. And, becoming Laura Bush the Second would be too much of a betrayal of who she is. What choice is she left with in this cruel Catch-22 of spousal identity?
A happy medium, apparently. Be opinionated, but not in a threatening way. Be smart, but not assertive or flashy with her intelligence. Be strong, be independent, but still feminine and wifely, whatever that means according to whoever defines such things. Good luck with that, Mrs. Obama. Good luck.
The commentary that all of this makes on America, however, is disturbing. Clearly we, or at least some of America, are not comfortable with a Mrs. Obama in the White House. Being outspoken is not okay. Being strong is discomforting. Being independent and accomplished makes some uncomfortable. Having one’s own mind, a powerful, free-ranging intellect, is certainly not alright in our president’s wife.
Would such aversion be present if Mrs. Obama were not a potential first lady, but rather a potential first gentleman? Further, does her being African-American have anything to do with it? Is it possible, above the surface or below, that being a strong African-American woman is distressing or threatening to some? To quote a classic Sir Mix-A-Lot video, “She’s just so … black!”
Certainly, Mrs. Obama, like anyone involved in a national election, needs to measure her words carefully. She should not, however, at the behest of her husband, his campaign or outside pressures, be untrue to herself. Let Michelle be Michelle. Her personality and true nature are a credit to herself, as well as a credit to the man who married her.
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(6)
June 20th, 2008 at 10:29 pm
I think it’s refreshing to have a potential first lady who has a strong opinion and stands by it. It’s too bad that she gets ridiculed for being competent.
June 21st, 2008 at 3:40 pm
very well put!
June 22nd, 2008 at 12:26 am
She got a bad rap for the whole “first time I’m proud of America” bit. And it will continue. In fact, it will only get worse because she has had a radical streak in her. Curious to see how she handles it.