democrats shmemocrats
by Emma Onom
Published: April 28, 2008
Now, usually I don’t do this, but I’d like to thank the Democrats today. I don’t usually believe this little ragtag group does much to further society, but I think they’ve made some great strides lately. The way the Democrats are running their presidential primary is probably the best thing they have ever done for Republicans, or America, for that matter.
Each day when I watch the news, there is a new story about the candidates’ inadequacies. Hillary Clinton has an alternate personality that apparently was attacked by sniper fire in Bosnia. Obama goes to a blatantly racist church, but it’s ok because white people are the devil.
Of course, there are excuses for all this. Hillary was sleepy, and I guess that makes it hard to tell the truth. Or maybe she was telling us about a dream she had? Barack goes to the church, but that doesn’t mean he believes the stuff, right? Why didn’t Romney ever think of that?
The longer the Democratic race goes on, the less credibility the candidates have, and the better the race gets for John McCain. Each Republican had the sense to drop out of the race and support McCain when it appeared they had the chance. The Democrats, on the other hand, can’t stop bickering and exposing each other’s weaknesses. Even their own party members will hate one candidate or another by the time the nominee is decided.
And how does this help McCain? Well, first of all, he’s moderate enough that the Democrats who hate Hillary, or Barack, or both, will be more willing to vote for McCain. Secondly, while they fight back and forth for months, John McCain has had plenty of time to act, well, presidential. He can spend his time discussing the economy, and other major concerns, while those who still pay attention to the Democrats have to decide who is the bigger liar.
The point is, the race will soon be McCain’s presidential credentials versus Obama’s or Clinton’s credibility as a human being. Shoot, I was on Romney’s side, but I’ll surely take McCain over a candidate that can’t argue like an adult.
Thanks guys.
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(11)
April 30th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
The Republican party twice nominates the worst President in recent history, is forced to send checks to millions of Americans and hope they spend it at Wal Mart to provide the illusion of economic stability and has firmly established our country as an international outcast. But the Democrats are losers. Makes total sense.
April 30th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
I guess if you want to blame a world recession on our President, then it might help to remember one Herbert Hoover, the Democratic president when the Great Depression started. Another Democrat, Andrew Jackson, advocated for Indian removal, and his successor, Martin Van Buren followed in his footsteps and was responsible for the Trail of Tears. But I guess Bush is the worst President in history.
May 7th, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Sorry, just caught this. Herbert Hoover the Democrat? Would you like to take another stab at that? I believe it was Al Smith (D-NY) that Hoover defeated in the election. Before you use Herbert Hoover to quasi-defend our current president, well, I think you get it. Com’on Emma!
Cheers,
-Shane
May 8th, 2008 at 9:27 am
yeah good catch on that, I was going to say something didn’t sound right there. Herbert Hoover was teh Republican that got us into the great depression. FDR was the Democrat that got us out. ahhh…That’s funny stuff.
May 8th, 2008 at 8:25 pm
Common GOP tactic: when it doesn’t exist, make it appear. And if it does exist, just make it look like you didn’t have anything to do with it in the first place.