who’s afraid of the big bad bear?
by Michelle Curtiss
Published: March 28, 2008
As a teenager I volunteered at a local police department. One of the first things I learned about self-defense was: when being attacked, first go slack just for an instant, then fight back. Whether you just loosen up for a second, or pretend to faint, your attacker will loosen up a little too, thinking the tough part is over… then you can catch them off guard. Fortunately, I’ve never had to use these techniques. Unfortunately, Russia has.
Remember the good old days when all the world talked about was the USSR and the USA? (Well, and maybe Afghanistan.) When war was cold, not like Iraq, and sitcoms like “Family Ties” spewed all kinds of political nonsense. Boy, aren’t we glad those days are past.
Now it’s all about Iraq and the USA. (Well, and maybe Afghanistan.) Wars are talked about like the evening sports, “Venezuela and Colombia getting into a rumble tonight. Israel and Pakistan keeping that old rivalry alive and the fans are eating it up. Live coverage of both events available on your satellite and instant replays on YouTube.” And thank goodness there is no longer any political bias on the evening soapcoms, children’s movies and most news programs.
What does this have to do with Russia? Everything. Imagine a country so big it is one of only two considered to hold the fate of the world in its hands: a Superpower. Nuclear weapons? Got ‘em! A government not concerned about morals, but just pure unbridled power? Got that, too! A history of terror and did I mention nuclear weapons? Bring it on! Then all of the sudden, their rival gives a “Tear down this wall!” speech. And what does Russia do? “Well why didn’t you say that before? We were just waiting for you to ask nicely. You know we were just pretending right? Say, got any extra foreign aid you’d like to send our way?” And so we send the money.
Fast forward about twenty years. Russia’s spent the last two decades not just pretending to faint, but to die. Then some interesting things happen. In 2001, Russia’s historic rival, the good ol’ USA, is attacked on its home soil. America enters a war on foreign soil and angers a few other countries. Because of internal power struggles public opinion is divided. The economy gets a little tight and the doomsayers start throwing parties… and that old dead country lying in the corner blinks. (Cue the dark suspenseful music)
Russia hasn’t even tried to hide the recent build up of its air force. In fact, for good measure, they have resumed old Cold War flyby tactics on the North Pole, Alaska and even U.S. Navy ships near Japan. Maybe if they had only done it one time it could be chalked up to good old fashioned humor and fun among old rivals. I think ten times from July 2007 to March 2008 means we are testing your response time and procedures. Couple that fact with Putin’s April 2007 threats of “mutual destruction” if the US pursues anti-missile defense systems in the Czech Republic and Poland. Putin even hand-picked his successor, Medvedev, and has agreed to take the job of Prime Minister for Russia. What a sacrifice for him. Now he can keep a close eye on things and make sure things keep going according to plan.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I’m not here to preach doom and gloom. I just think that if Russia is hit by a nuclear bomb, the north half of the country defrosts and the population moves a bit north. If the USA is hit, Canada might start drafting legislation to deal with all the illegal immigrants flooding their southern border. Perhaps we should keep a close eye on this situation.
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April 15th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
Good write up!!! Russia, not Iran, not Iraq, not Venezuela, not any terrorist group. Russia is the biggest threat to us today other then our internal strife. Great analogy