populist scum
by Ryan Porter
Published: February 19, 2008
Blessed are the rich, for their interests supersede all. - The Republican Bible
Newsflash: Populists are destroying America.
A Populist by definition is a politician who seeks to represent the Interests of ordinary people. Now at first glance this may not seem like such a bad idea. After all, aren’t we all ordinary people? Short answer:Yes. Long answer: No. As Republicans constantly remind us, the wealthiest Americans drive our free-market system and keep our economy afloat. Therefore, we should show them our gratitude by providing them with tax cuts to maintain and even burgeon the upper class. So if the upper class is the only thing standing between America and the third-world, then unchallenged populist efforts to serve ordinary people in the middle and lower classes will necessarily lead to the destruction of America-one rich guy at a time.
So who are these Populism Pipers, threatening to steal our wealth and children? These days populism is typically thought of as a platform for Democrats and enemy for Republicans. But 2008 is no typical year.
One presidential candidate, Republican Mike Huckabee, a living paradox unto himself, is attempting to bridge this entrenched political gap. His pledge to build and protect the middle class has some of his fellow Republicans calling him a populist. Preposterous! This pettifogging paradox purporting to portray a Republican as populist is purely petty politics serving as the proverbial political backhand! Unfortunately for Huckabee outspoken conservatives such as Pat Robertson, founder of the Christian Coalition, have withheld their support from Huckabee citing him as “too populist.”
But wait, as a Christian I always thought I was supposed to defend the poor and disenfranchised. Feed the hungry. Basically, fight for the interests of ordinary people as Jesus did. I know carpenters are typically known for their elitist leanings, but it seems like Jesus may have had a little populism in him, too. I guess that was before he became a Republican. Evidently, as a result of that undocumented political conversion, Republicans now have a monopoly on determining “What Would Political-Jesus Do?” For starters, rage against populism. If Robertson is an evangelical Christian preacher speaking on behalf of God, and Robertson hates poor people then from Robertson’s actions we can conclude that God hates poor people, too (despite all that he says to the contrary). Now I usually support the fight against poverty (www.ONE.org), but if that fight leads to facing God outside the saloon at high noon, I might have to rethink some things. Trust me you do not want to be on the receiving end of that - two words: Old Testament.
So what is the end game for populism? The destruction of America? An irksome week for God? Should Huckabee abandon his conflicted populist platform? Jesus himself said that the poor will always be with us (John 12:8), so should we even try to fight poverty if we already know we cannot win? Then again we are still in Iraq…
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