break out the chisels
by Alan Moore
Published: January 10, 2008
For a while now, I’ve heard many colleagues rationalize voting against Hillary Clinton for president by saying that, “A woman is too emotional to be president,” or my personal favorite, “Their emotions get in the way of making tough decisions.” Like she often does, Sen. Clinton has proven her detractors right. Even so, that’s not going to stop her from getting the nomination.
You’ve probably already heard about the situation (we all love the 24-hour news cycle), but I’ll go into brief detail here in case you haven’t. When asked a question by a voter at a campaign stop in Portsmouth, N.H., she turned on the tears. Her rationale as told to CNN anchor John Roberts: “Yes, I actually have emotions.” Really? I thought lizards were cold-blooded.
By the way, if you didn’t know, big media now tells us that Iowa and New Hampshire will determine the presidential election, so those of us in the other 48 states don’t have to bother with that little election thing.
In the rotunda of the U.S. Capitol, there is a block of marble just yearning to be carved. No, seriously, it’s already there. The first female president will have the honor of having themselves immortalized in marble on Capitol Hill.
So, you still think I’m insane with that “Break Out the Chisels” line? Give me another few lines, and the insanity will be no more.
The fact is: America is an emotional nation. Sometimes that’s a good thing, sometimes it’s a bad thing. Sometimes we all just need a good dose of Prozac to get by. I’m fairly certain the term, “drama queen” came about somewhere in the United States.
Therefore, with her show of emotion, Hillary’s at least gotten the nomination of the Democratic Party. With the violin-accompanied line of, “It’s all just so real to me, and I just can’t help but get emotional,” we might as well just open the White House jazz club, prepare Chief Justice Roberts for an impeachment trial, head for the border and most importantly, break out the chisels. You know Hillary will want to make sure to get her place in the Capitol in order to stare down her Congressional minions for years to come. Just creepy.
Just imagine how wonderful it will be for the Clintons though. Bill can have his White House affairs again, minus the risk of an impeachment trial. It’s sure to be bad for the rest of us, especially if Hillary bursts into tears and terminates California over Arnold’s last movie.
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